Tag: focus

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Laying the load down

Alone.  By yourself.  The only one.

Have you ever felt yourself in a situation where it seemed like the world is on your shoulders and there is no one there to help you carry the load?  Yes?  I know, me too.

Too many times, I’ve found myself in a place where I’ve felt like I’m all alone carrying the entire load of problems, failures, and possible outcomes all on my shoulders.  There is no one else there to help me.  If I fail, then that is it.  The world will come crashing down and it’s all my fault.

However dramatic that may sound on paper – I’ll admit, I’ve caught myself feeling this way.  I’m confident that you have too.  That feeling like it’s all up to me to handle is scary.  There is no other person who can get this done, help with this project or make this right.  If it fails, it’s all my fault.  And yet, the weight is too much for me to bear alone.

Friend, let me tell you – that whole conversation about how it is up to us to handle on our own is a lie from the pit of Hell.  You, dear friend, are never alone.  You do not have to carry everything all by yourself.

It is extremely important you understand that Our Father, the one who created the Heavens & the Earth, will help you carry your load.  You were never meant to do this life by yourself.  We are designed to be in relationship 1) with God and 2) with each other.

So next time you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders – close your eyes, take a deep breathe and lean into the presence of God.  Call on the Lord’s name and He will come to you (Isaiah 58: 9).  He is faithful to the end (Deuteronomy 7:9; 1 Corinthians 1:9; 2 Thessalonians 3:3).

It is so easy to get caught up in life, in our emotions and the right now.  But do what Paul commands up so to in Philippians 4:8 – think on things that are true, that are holy, that are right and that are pure.  Many times, our emotions cause us to do the exact opposite.

The best way to combat the lies of the enemy is with the truth of God.  The next time you are going through a season where you feel as though you are carrying the world on your shoulders, remember these scriptures – even recite them to yourself out loud so you hear them:

“This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.””

‭‭Joshua‬ ‭1:9‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭41:10‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.””

‭‭Deuteronomy‬ ‭31:6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:38-39‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Friend – remember this – you are never alone.  Ever. Put your load down and lean into God.

 

 

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Seeing Victory

Living on this earth can be so hard. It is in those hard times we either fall or rise above. The situations of life are usually out of our hands, but how we react to them is fully in our control.

My Aunt Carol drew the short straw. She was born to a mother who didn’t want her so her grandparents adopted her. Yes, she is biologically my cousin however, she is legally my aunt. Her parents loved her deeply and she lived a life knowing she was loved.

In grade school – Carol not only was diagnosed with a severe case of juvenile diabetes but also it was discovered her mind wasn’t going to grow passed a 3rd or 4th grader. She would never be able to be hired for even the simplest jobs because her severe diabetes and spent her life on government aid. When she finally got her own home, it was the greatest thing to ever happen to her.

Carol made some mistakes in trusting the wrong people in her youth. As she grew & matured, she started to understand some people are not for her. Thankfully, there were some folks who took her under their wing. It was through those folks when she really found Jesus.

When she was diagnosed with diabetes, the doctors told my grandparents that she wouldn’t live passed 30 years old. It would have probably been true if she didn’t find God. It was her faith in God that sustained her and kept her even when her body started to fail her.

When I would talk to her, she would tell me that God still had a plan for her and that is why he kept her here. Her faith helped her grow and thrive for years. Even when she could no longer walk or leave home, she had a positive outlook on life because she understood that life was a gift.

Carol stepped into Heaven this past Friday (October 25, 2019) just a few months from her 50th birthday, proving the doctors wrong. It’s sad she no longer is here, but I know that her faith in Jesus led her to Heaven.

Her body and mind are healed and whole…something she didn’t have on Earth. What a joyful thought to know she is finally able to know what it is like to have a body that works and a mind that understands. Even though I’m going to miss her, I am so happy she finally is whole.

Living life for Jesus means we will live again. Living for Jesus means that Heaven is our home. All the pain of this world will fall away as we step into God’s presence.

If my Aunt’s life taught me anything…it is that Jesus is a sustainer and a redeemer. Carol would tell you that Jesus will help you through anything. If you don’t know Jesus, consider changing that. Consider accepting Him as your Lord & savior. Doing that will not guarantee that this life will be easy, but it will guarantee that you can overcome even the hardest obstacle.

Carol won. She was victorious. Her life was not in vain and she got her reward. Now, on the other side of Heaven, she is more alive right now than she ever was here on earth. What a promise God has for us who call him Savior, Redeemer and Friend.

“So we are always confident, even though we know that as long as we live in these bodies we are not at home with the Lord. For we live by believing and not by seeing. Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord.”

2 Corinthians 5:6-8 NLT

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Peace of Life

To live a life of peace is to live a life of forgiveness. Letting go of what others have done to you or those you love and moving on with your life. Can you imagine what this world would be like if folks would live a life of forgiving others and moving on? No war, no hate, no confusion. But we live in a sinful, fallen world filled with pain and unforgiveness.

If forgiving people and moving on was easy, more people would do it. If it were easy to not hold a grudge and love people inspite of what they did to you, more people would be doing it. But it isn’t easy. In fact I’d say it is very difficult to let go of the things that deeply wound us.

Dare I say that it takes the help of the Holy Spirit to fully forgive and let go. I don’t think I can do that by myself in my own understanding. It is almost impossible. But with God, nothing is impossible.

Imagine the forgiveness Paul needed from his fellow believers. When he was Saul, he killed many Christians believing it was the right thing to do. When Jesus appeared and opened his eyes to his offense, Saul became Paul thus becoming a person who he once would have killed.

The gift of forgiveness was something Paul knew all too well. He needed it in order to fulfill his God-given calling. Because believers did offer it to him, his calling was fulfilled and they continued to grow in Christ.

Understanding that, he was able to write about forgiveness in some of his letters.

“Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”

Colossians 3:13 NLT

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”

Ephesians 4:31-32 NLT

I challenge you, dear reader, to step out of the easy and try forgiving those that hurt you. Give up your ability to hold a grudge and let go of that offense. Lean on the Holy Spirit to help you.

Free yourself and let it go. That burden is not something you were ever meant to bear. Imagine what could be ahead of you if you leave that offense behind you? Only great things!

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Have No Fear

Fear. How many times have you dealt with that? Probably too many times…

Life is full of things to be afraid of – tragedies, loss, betrayal and pain. It seems we face bad things all too often in this place we are just passing through, don’t we? It’s hard and sometimes unbearable.

If we don’t keep our eyes on Jesus, this life will eat us alive. We will be so overwhelmed, we wouldn’t know what to do. But thankfully, we know the one who spoke this world into existence!

1 Peter 5:7 says “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” Think about that for a moment – what would it look like if you casted ALL your cares on God? How much better would your life be without the worry, anxiety or depression? Who would you become if you stopped being afraid?

1 John 4:18 says that if we fear, we have not fully experienced God’s love because we fear God’s wrath more than understanding His love for us (this scripture is paraphrased into my own words and in its pure form at the end of the blog). Not fully understanding God’s love for us can really hinder our lives.

Imagine if you gave someone a gift that you knew would alter their life forever and they didn’t fully believe you had good motives in giving them that gift so they put it aside, waiting to see if it all was phony? How would you feel?

That is how God feels when we (as believers) follow Him, but don’t fully trust that He has our best interest at the root of it all.

So I encourage you – the one who struggles with fear, depression, anxiety and/or mistrust in God – lean into Jesus’ love and let it wash over you like a wave. Give Him your fears, doubts and worries. Let God fight your battles and go to sleep!

Rest, my dear friends- God has already won the victory and there is nothing He can not help us with. Surrender and let Him lead.

“And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world. Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love.”

1 John 4:17-18 NLT

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Measured Uniquely

How many times do we compare ourselves to others? Probably a lot more than we’d like to admit. For some reason, we believe we need to “one-up” each other to make ourselves look better than the next. It’s like we cannot be enough if our neighbor is winning.

It’s a Biblical problem that goes all the way back to Cain & Abel. In Genesis 4, we meet the two sons of Adam & Eve – Cain & Abel. One was a farmer and the other was a shepherd. The farmer (Cain) offered God a sacrifice of vegetation and the shepherd (Abel) offered God a sacrifice of meat. God only accepted Abel’s offering and Cain got so jealous that he killed his own brother. Cain was forever banished to wander the Earth.

Do you see how destructive comparison can be? Do you know that this isn’t God’s desire for us? Do you understand that God created each of us uniquely for a reason and purpose – to walk along side each other rather than against each other? (Isaiah 64:8, Ephesians 2:10, Ephesians 4:16)

Lisa Bevere says in her book Without Rival that God doesn’t love us equally, but uniquely. We are all made so intricately God cannot love us all in the same way, but His love for us is tailored to who He made us. (See Psalm 139:13-16)

Our focus should be running in comparison to Jesus. He is the one we should compare ourselves with & only Him. Jesus came to Earth not only to die for our sins, but to be our example. Set your gaze on His journey & not on your neighbors as comparison.

When we look over to our neighbors- we should be doing it to encourage, help or show love to them. When we care about each other & understand that we are meant to work with each other than against each other, the Body of Christ can thrive.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.”

Hebrews 12:1-2 NLT

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Hello Refresh

Rest…that has been something God has wanted me to pursue this year. That is one thing I have a hard time doing – not being in control & in the middle of everything. One thing that is not “natural” for me. I know some of you can relate.

Busyness is a common place for me. It is my comfort zone and it helps me define my worth. Yes, that is right…without something to do, I have a hard time seeing myself as important in this world. Without doing something – will people love me as I am? Will God accept me?

Am I good enough to just be me without offering anything to the world? Is it enough for me to not have 5 things happen all at the same time? If I’m not drowning in stuff to do, am I doing it right?

Oh, but when God says to do something, you should do it. I’ve learned this the hard way this year. God is a good Father and will step in if His children are stubborn. That stubborn child is me. Lord, help me.

God had to shift things up so that I would pay attention. Let me just tell you this – it is much easier if you just listen to God. Remember this next time you – yourself- want to be stubborn.

Don’t get me wrong, the fact that God stepped in is a place of celebration for me. This is because I know He cares and that I am His. Hebrews 12:6 says: ““For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.”” It is a blessing to be disciplined because it means He calls us His.

One thing God has helped me understand in this season is that He is in control. That He can be trusted. One of the reasons I was so busy was because I wanted to be in the middle of everything because I couldn’t trust that I would be cared for. I know, silly to think about how God won’t take care of me when He is so good however, that trust is not too easy to walk out.

Faith is a strange thing. When you don’t trust God with everything, you cannot have faith in Him with your whole heart. This is a problem for someone who lives for God – because your life contradicts itself. That was me. I was not allowing God to move in me like He wanted to.

So – now, after God got me alone, I had two choices. I could learn to lean into Him or walk away from Him. I chose to lean in. I wish I could say that it was easy, but it wasn’t. I could never imagine myself walking away from God, but it was still so hard to lean in and trust.

Let me tell you this – as I lean in closer, the more and more I see that He knows best. That His healing is not here today and gone tomorrow – it lasts. That whatever I face, He wants to fight for me (Exodus 14:14). And He can be trusted with everything – whatever it may be!

So if what I just described is something you have faced lately…know this – you can lean in and you can trust God. He will not leave you or abandon you!! Reach out to God, repent for not trusting Him and start following His lead.

“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God, and I trust him. For he will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease. He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.”

Psalms 91:1-4 NLT

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It’s time to move (on)

Have you ever done something stupid? Or hurt someone real bad? Or did something even worse…

We have all been there in some way. Each of us know what it’s like to feel guilt and shame. It’s part of this life. But this is also where we sometimes get caught up.

We even repent, ask God to forgive, make amends with others – and think we have fully moved on, but in the back of your mind, that thing is still there. It pops up in those late night thoughts and those lonely moments – making you feel hopeless.

Listen to me, friend, if it’s forgiven, move on. Stop beating yourself up. It’s time to forgive yourself and lay that guilt down.

If you haven’t repented or asked someone to forgive you, do it and don’t let it bother you any more. This life is far too fragile to allow yourself to be overridden with worry, regret, and shame.

Apologize to God and others (if needed) and keep going. Acknowledge that you cannot go back and change what happened in your past, but you can make sure it doesn’t happen in your future.

Remember that in Christ, you are a new creation. Tomorrow is a new day with new adventures. Hold your head up, shoulders back and show the Enemy he didn’t win!

“This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”

‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭5:17‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Prayer: Lord, you know that thing or things that hold me up & I cannot allow myself to forgive myself – help me let it go. If I have never asked you for repentance, please forgive me and help me do better in the future. Thank you for your Son Jesus and His sacrifice so I may ask for forgiveness and move on. You are so good! Amen.

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No Matter What

It seems the older I get, the more I realize how trust in God is our lifeline.

So many bad things can happen to us – it doesn’t matter how “holy” you are. But knowing that, no matter what we face, God has our back & will work everything out for our good. That knowledge brings a peace that knows no understanding.

Whatever you are going through, give it over to God & trust His ways. Lean into Him and find rest.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭3:5-6‬ ‭NIV‬‬

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Identity Crisis

I was sitting in church worshiping and a thought hit me…why do we, as born-again Christians, have such a hard time laying things down and living a life full of joy when we serve such a faithful and present God?  I have seen so many people stay in their struggle to overcome things in the past for years and years – going to the alter crying, being prophesied over, reading the Bible, and all the other things that seem the right thing to do when we are walking with God.  And yet, they still have this baggage tagging along.

Could it be that when we have struggled so long with something that it becomes a part of us?  And when it becomes a part of us, we are afraid that, if we allow God to heal that part of us we no longer are who we have become to know as ourselves?  Therefore, we find so much of our identity in the struggle – healing, even if subconsciously, is just too scary to accept?

If this is correct – then laying this issue fully down and giving it ALL over to God is a completely scary thing full of doubt and anxiety.  As we face the fact that healing will bring so much change that we decide not to fully give God the authority to do what He needs to do.  And then we remain sitting in our mess because that is easier than the change of healing – even though God is more than willing to give us what we need if we fully trust him.

Our identity was never for us to be hurt, broken or misused.  We never were meant to remain sick, hurt, abused, or stuck.  That is not who God is.  We have seen, over and over, how God has redeemed those in the Old and New Testament – Jacob, Judah, Joseph, Moses, Rahab, David, Bathsheba, Solomon, Peter, Paul – to name only a few who have seen the redemptive work of the Lord in their lives when they surrender all to Him.

So – what is it for you?  What issue do you face that you need to lay down?  Trauma, chronic sickness, your abusive past, shame from what you did in your past, drugs, alcohol, relationships that are not good for you…what is it that you are afraid to lay down?  What struggle has become your identity?

Whatever it is, remember these things:

  • We are a new creature in Christ Jesus
    • So we have stopped evaluating others from a human point of view. At one time we thought of Christ merely from a human point of view. How differently we know him now! This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! 2 Corinthians 5:16-17
  • We are called out of darkness and into light
    • But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. 1 Peter 2:9
  • Christ lives inside of us
    • My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20
  • We are friends of Jesus
    • I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn’t confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told me. John 15:15
  • We are God’s masterpiece
    • For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:10
  • We belong to God
    • But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you.
      O Israel, the one who formed you says,
      “Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.
      I have called you by name; you are mine. Isaiah 43:1
  • God’s thoughts about us are precious
    • How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
      They cannot be numbered!
      I can’t even count them;
      they outnumber the grains of sand! Psalm 139:17-18
  • We were knit together in our mother’s wombs
    • You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
      and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
      Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
      Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
      You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
      as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
      You saw me before I was born.
      Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
      Every moment was laid out
      before a single day had passed. Psalm 139:13-16

It’s time to start seeing our identity in Christ and not in the things that of this world.  No matter what someone has said to you or how someone made you feel, how long you have been sick or what secret shame you hide – God loves you and wants to make you whole.

Go to Him and give over those things that you are holding onto.  Let Him make you who He sees you to be!!

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32 Things I’ve Learned in 32 Years

I’m not in any way an expert on life, but being around for a few decades does give you some insight.  If nothing else, this was a fun writing exercise I wanted to share with everyone.  Here are 32 things I’ve learned in 32 years:

  1. I have learned a lot in 3 decades of life and yet there is still so much to learn. Life is complicated, messy and chaotic and it takes a life time to figure it out.
  2. Forgive quickly – I used to be offended by every little thing that someone would do that hurt me, even a tiny bit, and then I realized that I was pretty a miserable person. Forgiveness and grace is a beautiful thing and it not only releases the one who offended it also releases you.  Give it over to God and let Him deal with it.
  3. Find at least 1 person (it is better if there is more) who is older and have endured things you haven’t – who can share their wisdom with you. Some call them spiritual parents, others call them mentors and then others just call them friends.  Regardless of what you call them – make sure you do this – no matter what age, unless your 100 – then you’re good.
  4. When God gives you a promise, believe him. He is faithful.
  5. Let God fight your battles. His ways are better than our ways.  It may take time, but your victory is imminent.
  6. Worship and read the Bible daily. Spend time with God and let Him pour into you every day without exception – even if it is a simple scripture that you meditate on.
  7. Find time for you – it’s important to take care of and pour into you. People need you and if you (the person who looks back when you look in the mirror) do not allow yourself to be refilled – you won’t be able to be there for those who rely on you.  Make YOU a priority!
  8. No one will be able to do everything right 24/7 – give yourself some grace and allow yourself to make a few mistakes here and there. Learning from our mistakes makes us better.
  9. Make sure you let people know you love them and cherish them. Life is but a vapor and it can be over in an instant.
  10. Live in the moment – laugh often – make room for simple joys.
  11. Find some way to give back to people who cannot give back to you. That is one of the most fulfilling things in this life.
  12. Never give up on people. You may need to take a step back and create space, but don’t count a person out.  God has a plan for each and every person.
  13. Your weight isn’t everything. Focus on being healthy and making better choices because everyone isn’t going to be a size 0.
  14. Love with a fierceness and watch the people around you change for the good.
  15. Speak the truth in love. Don’t water the truth down, but don’t slap a person with it either.
  16. Life is crazy – learn to find humor in the rough areas.
  17. No matter how old you are – find someone to pour your wisdom into.
  18. Stop striving for perfection – that is an impossible task.
  19. Be genuinely you with at least 3 people in your life so they can hold you accountable. And then make sure you hold them accountable in return.
  20. Celebrate the small victories in life.
  21. Dream big with God – don’t let anyone tell you that a God-dream cannot happen.
  22. Asking for help isn’t weak, but shows great character when you say “I can’t do this alone”
  23. Try to be humble even when it is hard. The world will tell you to push people out of the way, but the Kingdom of God runs on others serving others.  Be a servant.
  24. If you know you’ve done wrong – apologize. It won’t be that hard to do.
  25. Appreciate those in your life who help you – at work, church, home, grocery store, mechanic – strangers, friends and family – know that they don’t have to do anything for you.
  26. Put your words into actions – do what you say you are going to do & follow your own advice. (I’m smiling right now because I’m writing this long list that I now need to follow – ha!)
  27. Don’t do something in the dark you wouldn’t want to be seen in the light. Live a life of integrity – it means you spend less time covering things up!
  28. Don’t minimize yourself to please others. Be the person who God made you to be even if others don’t understand you.  God will sustain you and take care of the critics.
  29. Fly under the radar – surprising people is fun!
  30. Enjoy the journey and the people that are on it with you.
  31. Read more and watch TV less
  32. Never, ever give up – no matter what. Every day brings new mercies…

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