Author: bgaigalas

I grew up and have lived in the Dallas/Ft Worth area all my life. Graduated with a BA in Psychology and an MA in Counseling from Dallas Baptist University. I love serving and helping others - which I get to do with my amazing church on a weekly basis. True joy comes from giving rather than receiving. To say a little about my personality - I have always been unusual. I used to hate it, but now I embrace it. There is a purpose and a plan for me - even in my weirdness! Living with who we are is a part of the journey. Embrace who God made you and see how far He takes you! One thing you need to know is I love God. He is the most important person in my life. He is the rock when everything else crumbles. I love to talk about Him, who He is, what He does and how we relate to Him. I am still learning and growing and I hope you learn and grow with me. Like my post, have a question, comment, etc.? I would love to hear your feedback! Feel free to send me a note on here!
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Trauma = things we were never meant to carry

I believe the Genesis story of Adam and Eve is truth and not fiction.  The key take aways from that story are 1) we are all made in the image of God and 2) we were not created to endure the impact of sin.  God created us to live to worship Him in peace and love.  We were not supposed to know or understand evil.  But when sin entered our consciousness, evil was made real to us.  

If you watch a child, there is an innocence to them – they have not experienced the understanding of evil.  It isn’t until evil is made known to them that they start to become “wise” to this world’s reality.  

The impact of sin is something that we often wrestle with.  It jades us and makes us not want to trust those around us.  It brings destruction, tears down families and friends.  It brings suffering, it brings death and it brings trauma.

Trauma – defined as by the American Psychology Association – is “any disturbing experience that results in significant fear, helplessness, dissociation, confusion or other disruptive feelings intense enough to have long-lasting negative effects on a person’s attitude, behavior and other aspects of functioning.”

We went through an event this past week where we witnessed someone’s public death.  It was traumatic and it brought out a lot of emotions.  I’m sure you’ve also endured other events that impacted you in a traumatic way.

We were never meant to endure something like that – people were never meant to die, we were never meant to hate each other, kill each other, turn our backs on each other.  These are the direct results of sin and evil.  Because we were not created to understand this, it impacts our hearts, minds and souls.

What is the solution?  Jesus.  He is the solution.  2,000 years ago He died on a cross so that evil and sin may be defeated.  And He rose 3 days later to show He was victorious.  Death and Hell were defeated.  Hallelujah!

So if you’re having a hard time dealing with the world right now for any reason, turn to Jesus.  Open His word, which is alive, and discover His truth.  Some of that truth is:

John 16:33: “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”

Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

Jesus is the answer to all trauma.  Because Jesus overcame the impact of trauma on the cross.  There will be no trauma in heaven.  So let’s make heaven crowded!

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Harmony in a time of Disruption

Peace.

It’s a doozy of a word, isn’t it? It’s something we all strive for. Wars are fought for peace. Families are destroyed for the sake of peace.

Peace is a word that is heavy, often misunderstood. Chaos is the norm in this world; turmoil the constant companion. Peace seems other worldly. How can it be obtained? How can it grow and thrive in such a barren land?

This world has seen some crazy things over the past year. We’ve watched the world shut down, violence erupt and people turning on each other for the sake of being “right”. We’ve all but thought peace was a thing for our children to wonder about.

But…Jesus said ‘“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”’

John 16:33 ESV.

It’s so easy to forget that, as people of faith, we have peace with us always in the person of the Holy Spirit. It’s so easy to get caught up in the trials of this world.

God has already given us this promise. He has already conquered the chaos and the strife. He has already won the war. Our issue is that we don’t allow God into our fights.

Human beings are so self centered. It’s all about us and how we see the world. We fail to allow God into our world so He can shine the light on a dark situation.

This time we are all living in – this virus, this unrest – are all opportunities to exercise our faith. Will we trust God when it gets scary? Can we lay our impossible situation at His feet and walk away? Will we allow God to fight our battles? Will we hand over our will for His?

These are the questions we are all facing right now. This life isn’t easy. We are going to fail at this faith walk at times. But we serve a gracious God who will run to us when we call out no matter how bad we screwed up. He is a good, good Father.

So lean into God when this life becomes overwhelming. Read the Word of God. Pray. Worship. Find yourself in the presence of the King of Kings. Because God will always be the answer to this world’s chaos.

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”

Philippians 4:6-7 NLT

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Change must come

There are moments in life when you know we cannot go back to the way we were. We are in such a season right now. Y’all – America is hurting. Most notably, those Americans that are people of color are hurting.

I’m not a person of color. I may not 100% understand the pain folks are going through, but I can acknowledge that there is a huge group of people who are hurting. And that makes me hurt.

But what can I do? That’s what my prayer is right now. God, what can I do? How can I make a difference?

I’m still learning this. I’m still working through what I can do. But here are some things I have decided to do:

1. Acknowledge the pain – it’s there and it matters.

2. Stop listening to respond & start listening to understand.

3. Understand that people of color have had too many experiences where they have been told they are less than…and that needs to change.

4. Love people & give them grace. You don’t have to agree with everything they say to love them. Love can move mountains.

5. Pray. Pray that God moves the hearts of those who hate & change that hate into love. Pray that those who hurt are healed. Pray that we see unity.

6. Make a commitment to learn about the experience of someone who doesn’t look like you. Seeing the world through someone else’s eyes will help each of us grow.

7. Understand & acknowledge that we were (and are) one race. Yes, there are differences. Yes, we don’t look alike. But we are all made in the image of God. That makes each of us special & important.

I’m still learning y’all. But I’m committed to continue to learn. Because things have to change.

“For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. If all were a single member, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, yet one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and on those parts of the body that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor, and our unpresentable parts are treated with greater modesty, which our more presentable parts do not require. But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.”

1 Corinthians 12:14-26 ESV

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Peaceful Chaos

Life has changed quite a bit for everyone over the last few months, hasn’t it? Where once we were spending our time going & doing, we are now spending time inside waiting for this plague to pass by us. Who knew 2020 would include such a shift in reality for all of us?

Having more time on my hands, I’ve spent more time introspecting – looking at the condition of my heart, mind & soul. Being a psychology nerd, this is a normal path for me to take. It’s just what I’ve learned to do when things get quiet. Sigmund Freud & Alfred Adler would be proud.

I’ve looked over the last few years and how I’ve spent my time. To be transparent with you – I’ve noticed something I didn’t like about myself. Something that didn’t serve me well. I had spent way too much time trying to find my worth in what I do. I believed with all my heart that my actions equal my worth. People pleasing. Running myself ragged. Doing too much. And I now know that cannot continue when we are finally released back to the wild.

As a follower of Christ, my head knows that my worth is in God, but my heart didn’t know it. My heart believed I had to prove my worthiness in what I do. How I serve. How seen I am by others. Now, sitting behind doors and not being seen, my heart is learning that my only audience is God. To please God is to fulfill my purpose. And my purpose is to belong to God. Everything else will fall into place.

Friend, I’m sharing this with you not for catharsis, but to remind you that, no matter how small you feel, God sees you. No matter what you’ve done in life, God loves you. No matter where you’ve gone, God wants you.

In this time when the world has stopped, God started to speak to my heart & reminded me that He sees me. He cares for me and He wants a close relationship with me. God wants the same thing for you.

Take some time today to spend with God. Take some time to remember that belonging to God is the goal in life. Take some time to remember that He knows, He cares and He sees.

Be blessed, dear friends. Even in the midst of chaos – we know the Peace speaker. We know His name. Jesus!

““So have no fear of them, for nothing is covered that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known. What I tell you in the dark, say in the light, and what you hear whispered, proclaim on the housetops. And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell. Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows. So everyone who acknowledges me before men, I also will acknowledge before my Father who is in heaven, but whoever denies me before men, I also will deny before my Father who is in heaven.”

Matthew 10:26-33 ESV

“For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Romans 5:6-8 ESV

“So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

2 Corinthians 12:7-10 ESV

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Laying the load down

Alone.  By yourself.  The only one.

Have you ever felt yourself in a situation where it seemed like the world is on your shoulders and there is no one there to help you carry the load?  Yes?  I know, me too.

Too many times, I’ve found myself in a place where I’ve felt like I’m all alone carrying the entire load of problems, failures, and possible outcomes all on my shoulders.  There is no one else there to help me.  If I fail, then that is it.  The world will come crashing down and it’s all my fault.

However dramatic that may sound on paper – I’ll admit, I’ve caught myself feeling this way.  I’m confident that you have too.  That feeling like it’s all up to me to handle is scary.  There is no other person who can get this done, help with this project or make this right.  If it fails, it’s all my fault.  And yet, the weight is too much for me to bear alone.

Friend, let me tell you – that whole conversation about how it is up to us to handle on our own is a lie from the pit of Hell.  You, dear friend, are never alone.  You do not have to carry everything all by yourself.

It is extremely important you understand that Our Father, the one who created the Heavens & the Earth, will help you carry your load.  You were never meant to do this life by yourself.  We are designed to be in relationship 1) with God and 2) with each other.

So next time you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders – close your eyes, take a deep breathe and lean into the presence of God.  Call on the Lord’s name and He will come to you (Isaiah 58: 9).  He is faithful to the end (Deuteronomy 7:9; 1 Corinthians 1:9; 2 Thessalonians 3:3).

It is so easy to get caught up in life, in our emotions and the right now.  But do what Paul commands up so to in Philippians 4:8 – think on things that are true, that are holy, that are right and that are pure.  Many times, our emotions cause us to do the exact opposite.

The best way to combat the lies of the enemy is with the truth of God.  The next time you are going through a season where you feel as though you are carrying the world on your shoulders, remember these scriptures – even recite them to yourself out loud so you hear them:

“This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.””

‭‭Joshua‬ ‭1:9‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭41:10‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.””

‭‭Deuteronomy‬ ‭31:6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:38-39‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Friend – remember this – you are never alone.  Ever. Put your load down and lean into God.

 

 

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Seeing Victory

Living on this earth can be so hard. It is in those hard times we either fall or rise above. The situations of life are usually out of our hands, but how we react to them is fully in our control.

My Aunt Carol drew the short straw. She was born to a mother who didn’t want her so her grandparents adopted her. Yes, she is biologically my cousin however, she is legally my aunt. Her parents loved her deeply and she lived a life knowing she was loved.

In grade school – Carol not only was diagnosed with a severe case of juvenile diabetes but also it was discovered her mind wasn’t going to grow passed a 3rd or 4th grader. She would never be able to be hired for even the simplest jobs because her severe diabetes and spent her life on government aid. When she finally got her own home, it was the greatest thing to ever happen to her.

Carol made some mistakes in trusting the wrong people in her youth. As she grew & matured, she started to understand some people are not for her. Thankfully, there were some folks who took her under their wing. It was through those folks when she really found Jesus.

When she was diagnosed with diabetes, the doctors told my grandparents that she wouldn’t live passed 30 years old. It would have probably been true if she didn’t find God. It was her faith in God that sustained her and kept her even when her body started to fail her.

When I would talk to her, she would tell me that God still had a plan for her and that is why he kept her here. Her faith helped her grow and thrive for years. Even when she could no longer walk or leave home, she had a positive outlook on life because she understood that life was a gift.

Carol stepped into Heaven this past Friday (October 25, 2019) just a few months from her 50th birthday, proving the doctors wrong. It’s sad she no longer is here, but I know that her faith in Jesus led her to Heaven.

Her body and mind are healed and whole…something she didn’t have on Earth. What a joyful thought to know she is finally able to know what it is like to have a body that works and a mind that understands. Even though I’m going to miss her, I am so happy she finally is whole.

Living life for Jesus means we will live again. Living for Jesus means that Heaven is our home. All the pain of this world will fall away as we step into God’s presence.

If my Aunt’s life taught me anything…it is that Jesus is a sustainer and a redeemer. Carol would tell you that Jesus will help you through anything. If you don’t know Jesus, consider changing that. Consider accepting Him as your Lord & savior. Doing that will not guarantee that this life will be easy, but it will guarantee that you can overcome even the hardest obstacle.

Carol won. She was victorious. Her life was not in vain and she got her reward. Now, on the other side of Heaven, she is more alive right now than she ever was here on earth. What a promise God has for us who call him Savior, Redeemer and Friend.

“So we are always confident, even though we know that as long as we live in these bodies we are not at home with the Lord. For we live by believing and not by seeing. Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord.”

2 Corinthians 5:6-8 NLT

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Peace of Life

To live a life of peace is to live a life of forgiveness. Letting go of what others have done to you or those you love and moving on with your life. Can you imagine what this world would be like if folks would live a life of forgiving others and moving on? No war, no hate, no confusion. But we live in a sinful, fallen world filled with pain and unforgiveness.

If forgiving people and moving on was easy, more people would do it. If it were easy to not hold a grudge and love people inspite of what they did to you, more people would be doing it. But it isn’t easy. In fact I’d say it is very difficult to let go of the things that deeply wound us.

Dare I say that it takes the help of the Holy Spirit to fully forgive and let go. I don’t think I can do that by myself in my own understanding. It is almost impossible. But with God, nothing is impossible.

Imagine the forgiveness Paul needed from his fellow believers. When he was Saul, he killed many Christians believing it was the right thing to do. When Jesus appeared and opened his eyes to his offense, Saul became Paul thus becoming a person who he once would have killed.

The gift of forgiveness was something Paul knew all too well. He needed it in order to fulfill his God-given calling. Because believers did offer it to him, his calling was fulfilled and they continued to grow in Christ.

Understanding that, he was able to write about forgiveness in some of his letters.

“Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”

Colossians 3:13 NLT

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”

Ephesians 4:31-32 NLT

I challenge you, dear reader, to step out of the easy and try forgiving those that hurt you. Give up your ability to hold a grudge and let go of that offense. Lean on the Holy Spirit to help you.

Free yourself and let it go. That burden is not something you were ever meant to bear. Imagine what could be ahead of you if you leave that offense behind you? Only great things!

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Have No Fear

Fear. How many times have you dealt with that? Probably too many times…

Life is full of things to be afraid of – tragedies, loss, betrayal and pain. It seems we face bad things all too often in this place we are just passing through, don’t we? It’s hard and sometimes unbearable.

If we don’t keep our eyes on Jesus, this life will eat us alive. We will be so overwhelmed, we wouldn’t know what to do. But thankfully, we know the one who spoke this world into existence!

1 Peter 5:7 says “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” Think about that for a moment – what would it look like if you casted ALL your cares on God? How much better would your life be without the worry, anxiety or depression? Who would you become if you stopped being afraid?

1 John 4:18 says that if we fear, we have not fully experienced God’s love because we fear God’s wrath more than understanding His love for us (this scripture is paraphrased into my own words and in its pure form at the end of the blog). Not fully understanding God’s love for us can really hinder our lives.

Imagine if you gave someone a gift that you knew would alter their life forever and they didn’t fully believe you had good motives in giving them that gift so they put it aside, waiting to see if it all was phony? How would you feel?

That is how God feels when we (as believers) follow Him, but don’t fully trust that He has our best interest at the root of it all.

So I encourage you – the one who struggles with fear, depression, anxiety and/or mistrust in God – lean into Jesus’ love and let it wash over you like a wave. Give Him your fears, doubts and worries. Let God fight your battles and go to sleep!

Rest, my dear friends- God has already won the victory and there is nothing He can not help us with. Surrender and let Him lead.

“And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world. Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love.”

1 John 4:17-18 NLT

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Measured Uniquely

How many times do we compare ourselves to others? Probably a lot more than we’d like to admit. For some reason, we believe we need to “one-up” each other to make ourselves look better than the next. It’s like we cannot be enough if our neighbor is winning.

It’s a Biblical problem that goes all the way back to Cain & Abel. In Genesis 4, we meet the two sons of Adam & Eve – Cain & Abel. One was a farmer and the other was a shepherd. The farmer (Cain) offered God a sacrifice of vegetation and the shepherd (Abel) offered God a sacrifice of meat. God only accepted Abel’s offering and Cain got so jealous that he killed his own brother. Cain was forever banished to wander the Earth.

Do you see how destructive comparison can be? Do you know that this isn’t God’s desire for us? Do you understand that God created each of us uniquely for a reason and purpose – to walk along side each other rather than against each other? (Isaiah 64:8, Ephesians 2:10, Ephesians 4:16)

Lisa Bevere says in her book Without Rival that God doesn’t love us equally, but uniquely. We are all made so intricately God cannot love us all in the same way, but His love for us is tailored to who He made us. (See Psalm 139:13-16)

Our focus should be running in comparison to Jesus. He is the one we should compare ourselves with & only Him. Jesus came to Earth not only to die for our sins, but to be our example. Set your gaze on His journey & not on your neighbors as comparison.

When we look over to our neighbors- we should be doing it to encourage, help or show love to them. When we care about each other & understand that we are meant to work with each other than against each other, the Body of Christ can thrive.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.”

Hebrews 12:1-2 NLT

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Hello Refresh

Rest…that has been something God has wanted me to pursue this year. That is one thing I have a hard time doing – not being in control & in the middle of everything. One thing that is not “natural” for me. I know some of you can relate.

Busyness is a common place for me. It is my comfort zone and it helps me define my worth. Yes, that is right…without something to do, I have a hard time seeing myself as important in this world. Without doing something – will people love me as I am? Will God accept me?

Am I good enough to just be me without offering anything to the world? Is it enough for me to not have 5 things happen all at the same time? If I’m not drowning in stuff to do, am I doing it right?

Oh, but when God says to do something, you should do it. I’ve learned this the hard way this year. God is a good Father and will step in if His children are stubborn. That stubborn child is me. Lord, help me.

God had to shift things up so that I would pay attention. Let me just tell you this – it is much easier if you just listen to God. Remember this next time you – yourself- want to be stubborn.

Don’t get me wrong, the fact that God stepped in is a place of celebration for me. This is because I know He cares and that I am His. Hebrews 12:6 says: ““For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.”” It is a blessing to be disciplined because it means He calls us His.

One thing God has helped me understand in this season is that He is in control. That He can be trusted. One of the reasons I was so busy was because I wanted to be in the middle of everything because I couldn’t trust that I would be cared for. I know, silly to think about how God won’t take care of me when He is so good however, that trust is not too easy to walk out.

Faith is a strange thing. When you don’t trust God with everything, you cannot have faith in Him with your whole heart. This is a problem for someone who lives for God – because your life contradicts itself. That was me. I was not allowing God to move in me like He wanted to.

So – now, after God got me alone, I had two choices. I could learn to lean into Him or walk away from Him. I chose to lean in. I wish I could say that it was easy, but it wasn’t. I could never imagine myself walking away from God, but it was still so hard to lean in and trust.

Let me tell you this – as I lean in closer, the more and more I see that He knows best. That His healing is not here today and gone tomorrow – it lasts. That whatever I face, He wants to fight for me (Exodus 14:14). And He can be trusted with everything – whatever it may be!

So if what I just described is something you have faced lately…know this – you can lean in and you can trust God. He will not leave you or abandon you!! Reach out to God, repent for not trusting Him and start following His lead.

“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God, and I trust him. For he will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease. He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.”

Psalms 91:1-4 NLT